Cannot Cum from BJ - Ideas?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by bertstareddd, Jun 10, 2011.

  1. bertstareddd

    bertstareddd New Member

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    I've been dating my girlfriend for 2.5 months. Everything is going great but I can't seem to cum from a bj or hj. This is something that is really starting to bother me - I can get her off (or have 2X in the past), but I can never cum so it seems backwards from normal. I'm supposed to be the easy one.

    It all feels great, of course, and she's real good at it (granted, Ive only had 2 girls go down on me but shes better than the first for sure). She strokes with her hand while sucking, is not afraid to deepthroat, uses tongue etc. and will go for 15-20 minutes. I came close to cumming only once and other than that it feels great, but I cannot come close.

    Maybe I am thinking about it too much, but I have been trying to relax more lately and I'm not seeing much of a difference. There's nothing wrong with my pipes because I can cum from masturbation fairly easily.
     
  2. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    It's fairly common. Most guys just over think it.

    Just don't think about it at all. Just lay back and enjoy. Don't think about relaxing, don't think about anything other then the feeling. Maybe use what you masturbate to to get off.
     
  3. Meee

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    There are some things you can try:

    Use your hand a little while she's doing it.

    Don't masturbate for an extra day or two before you have a date.

    Be a little more active when she's doing it. Make some movements in her mouth, though start out gently. She will probably find it erotic too.
     
  4. Lucky

    Lucky New Member

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    Abstain from cumming for a week or two and then see what happens. We can overuse the ol tool occationally. Also, how old are you? As you age, it takes more time to cum.
     
  5. giannoutso83

    giannoutso83 New Member

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    i feel what your saying...i rarely cum from BJ unless i am really aroused or its a quickie kind of thing...its more of something that just leads to something else . but a bj just doesnt get me off most of hte time
     
  6. 33stack

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    its always a little harder to cum from a bj...
     
  7. Jonger84

    Jonger84 New Member

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    Maybe you put yourself into the stress of .. "I have to jerk off .."

    while you are used to a different pressure on you .. like your hands .. too much masterbation may result so ..
     
  8. pbs

    pbs
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    Try staying in her pussy until just before you're ready to cum, and then let her finish you off with her mouth, and hand if necessary. With some luck, you'll be able to put it back into her pussy before it goes soft after your orgasm and, if she's really soft and smooth down there (shaved), be able to gradually get hard again and have another orgasm in her pussy. Ever since we began doing this, it's taken 2 orgasms to satisfy me.
     
  9. wht1zzfe

    wht1zzfe New Member

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    i think youre kind of lucky. sex if fine, but a blowjob will finish me off so fast. longest ive ever lasted was a commercial break... idk why.
     
  10. Druthers

    Druthers New Member

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    I can't cum from a bj unless I'm pumping my hips, at least a little.

    Try that?
     
  11. Ryaan

    Ryaan New Member

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    Have her play with your balls while she's doing it. Or, if your adventurous enough, have her plant one of her fingers up the ole pucker. Works like a charm for me!
     
  12. ply

    ply
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    That's the way we always did it. If she's already deep throating you couple that with a little face fucking.

    The wife always loved it and came almost every time.
     
  13. Alwayslearningsex

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    Maybe the methods she uses. While this feels great she is not doing it the way you need to cum.
    Last times I received HJ she kept switching when the sensations started in the right direction, starting over again. I had to take her hand and have her do it the right way. Well, so much play and stimulation, she was determined to get me off, and when I did, BAM! Don't masturbate too much, show her how it works for you and she does it, and for oral, try slower, more around the head but not on it too much at first to keep it as a dessert when things are feeling real good, work up to it. Just watch her do it, a turn on to me anyway, have her fondle your balls, stroke your cock mid shaft, low on the shaft, high and closer to the head until the feeling is right, then you tell her to keep it there until you cum. the orgasm should be strong with a good cumshot as well.
     
  14. lbushwalker

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    I also rarely cum from oral sex but for me it seems to be a mental block as always previously considered it a disrecpectful or selfish male activity.
    Having now experienced many women who adore doing it has changed the rationale but not the automatic self control trigger.
    Only time I can come that way is by closing my eyes and fantasising pussy humping and nipple sucking, in other words using reverse psychology ie thinking of pleasuring the girl rather than me alone.
     
  15. Barbwire

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    That's interesting, bushwalker.

    I have only been unable to get one man off since I started my blowjob hobby. Once he told me he wasn't able to cum from a bj, I just said to myself, FUCK THAT SHIT! and sucked the bejeezus out of him until he told me to stop.

    I was young then and didn't try to anally stimulate him so I don't know if I could get him off today but, he's like the one that got away, ya know? He still haunts me.
     
  16. Nobody

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    I'm in an open relationship and I remember being quite instructive with my now girlfriend about what made for great oral. She couldn't get me off with her mouth in the early days of our relationship, but she's paid attention and learned along the way. She's getting better, two out of three times, she can get me off with her mouth and tongue.

    The other night I was with a woman who must have spent twenty-five minutes sucking, tugging, and licking my cock to the point that I began to feel chafed. While in contrast, a week earlier another woman brought me to climax in three minutes without even using her hands.

    In the history of sex, men have the reputation of being incredibly easy to please and that any girl will do, but the truth is that it takes a the right girl with the right skills and there are very few of these girls (just as there are men) when compared to the masses who just attack it in a very general fashion. I've had mind-blowing orgasms from oral and other times I've just thought 'Aw, you're cute for trying."
     
  17. NedF

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    Having my ass and/or balls touched while getting a BJ causes me to blow my load every time.

    My wife enjoys sucking me off and leaves the decision of where I make the deposit totally up to me. Although she might brush up close to my ass with her hand once in a while while stroking my balls she shys away from my ass. :(

    If I really want to cum in her mouth I just hold the back of her head and and gently fuck her throat in time with what she is doing on her own. Once I go past the point of no return I let her take control again. :blowjob
     
  18. Essene

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    I have never came from fellatio being performed on me. That isn't to suggest that I won't; but merely that it has yet to happen. I am completely content with it not happening though.
     
  19. thegreatest100

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    Does her hand just stroke or slide? My wife calls it the slider lol. She gets my dick wet and slimy first. It's all about the hand motion. She sucks on top but uses her hand to stoke me. However her hand must slide, kind of like it slipped through her hand.

    I got a blow job by another women after her and it was weak. She stroked but didn't do the slide thing. Didn't want to get sloppy ya know lol. So I suggest to have her make it all slimy and do the slidder.
     
  20. GraceFull

    GraceFull New Member

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    Let me chime in from a chics perspective with some advice. I agree with some here, less masturbation might help. Foreplay during the day, sexting etc... My best advice, when you start to lose it a bit, get your partner to take a vibrator (like a pocket rocket) to stimulate that most sensitive spot on the underside tip while she keeps on giving you a bj. She can also try using it on the spot between your balls and anus. As a final suggestion all guys I've encountered love a little anal stimulation. It is like putting their bone on turbo.