Can you live with your ex?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by AUserName, Jan 13, 2010.

  1. AUserName

    AUserName New Member

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    We started out as roomates and at the time I was looking for a friend but it grew to something more. Fast forward 3 years and I have finally ended my first relationship. Reasons for the breakup:

    1) Endless arguing and bickering, no real communitcation.
    2) He would choose porn over me, nuff said!
    3) No romance or passion whatsoever
    4) Has countless issues of his own he needs to workout (weight, depression, money, job, school)
    5) Too different. (Opposites weren't attracting in this case)

    He is not okay with my decision and has finally drifted off to sleep after alot of crying and it makes me very sad to see him like this. I have told him he doesn't have to leave because quite frankly I like the company and I know he has no where else to go. People have been telling me that he has to leave and not give a shit about what happens to him but I can't find it in my heart to do that.

    I don't love him anymore but I still care about him. Is this normal? I don't really know what to do in this case and was wondering if anybody had some helpful advice or experience about this kind of situation. I would be happy if he stayed with me but can you really live with an ex ?
     
  2. Bohohippy

    Bohohippy New Member

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    God yeah is it normal to care about him =] I can't understand you completely because I've never fallen out of love but frankly the best thing for him is to move out and find somewhere else. He won't heal or get over you if he's seeing you constantly... THink about it when it comes to another relationship, how are they going to feel if you live with an ex? I've always been a mess after relationship ends and the best thing for me is to be apart and not see them... Has he any mates he can room mate with? x


    P.S I admire you for taking control of your life and leaving. It's very hard to make that decision let alone stick to it =]
     
  3. Barbwire

    Gold Member

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    I've been in your shoes AUser, I've fallen out of love with a man that I was living with; have done it a few times, actually.

    One thing I have learned is, the longer you live under the same roof, the more painful the break-up is. Time for you two to part company. Try to do it as graciously as possible and if you need someone to talk to about it, we're here for ya.
     
  4. Dragon_Fire

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    I once read that it takes 90 days of no contact at all to fully get over someone if you're the one dumped. How can he possibly get over you when we has to see you everyday? The kindest thing that you can do would be to help him find alternative living arrangements.

    I think that if people have been separated for several years they would possibly live together but not while it's so fresh.