I have several questions that pertain to the sex live of me and my husband. I will start off with a little history about our relationship. My husband is 46 years old and I am 45 we have been married for 24 years. We have two teenage sons. I am beginning to question if in fact my husband still finds me sexually attractive. My husband tells me that he was a virgin when we met. After we begin dating we enjoyed frequent and pleasurable sex. My husband (then boyfriend) was always willing to “go down” on me. While I found this to be enjoyable, I could never bring myself to return the favor to him. Once we were married it seems as if our sex life has been on a constant slowdown. For the past two years (maybe longer) we have had sex an average of three times per month. My husband has always been more than willing to have sex with me but it seems that I was never in the mood. When we did have sex I found it pleasurable and had no problem having mutable organisms. My husband has always wanted to go down on me, but once we were married I did not permit this. Likewise, he has constantly ask, or hinted that he would like me to give him head---but I have always refused to give in. Over the past two weeks all of this changed. My husband has been spending much more time with me and I have gotten a sudden urge to have sex almost all day long. This past week, he was on vacation and we had sex several times per day. This included regular sex, as well as oral for both him and me. My husband said that he felt he would go his whole life without a blowjob-----he has had many of them just in this past week. Now here is my question, while we were sharing our thoughts this week my husband told me that he regularly masturbated during the times we did not have sex (remember 3 times per month. When ask about this, my husband showed me a book that he had hidden in the bathroom. He said he used this book while masturbating. Upon looking at the book (called the ultimate sex book by Anne Hooper) I found that it contained pictures of couples having sex. My husband tells me that during the time that he was masturbating he would look at these pictures and think about doing these things with me. I have to wonder if that is true----after all----if he is thinking about me, why would be looking at other women? He also has several instructional sex DVD’s that he has bought, again, he said he bought these to boost our sex life-----again, I question why he would need to view these----I am thinking he simply wants to view the sex acts for his own pleasure. He has had these tapes for quite sometime and had never shared them with me until now. During the past week we were having sex mutable times per day and he got to the point that it was difficult for him to have an erection. It seemed however that he had no problems with this when I provided him with oral sex. Last night we begin to have sex and he was hard, I was on top of him (as usual) and had one orgasm----he suddenly went limp and could not get it back up. After about a 5-10 min rest, I went down on him and he was once again hard---after telling him I wanted him to cum in my mouth, he did so. Again, this was a first for the both of us. I now find myself thinking that he went limp while we were having regular sex---but had no problem getting hard and coming with the BJ. Could my husband be thinking of me during regular sex (and going limp) and thinking of others when I am giving him head? He said that it (going limp) is a combination of seven or more days of sex in a row (two tree times per day) and the fact that he gets hard on oral is due to the fact that he has never had a BJ (until now) and is finding it super exciting. My husband constantly tells me he loves me and I have no reason to think that he has ever been unfaithful. But I am still left to wonder----does he still want me???? I would like to have sex with my husband in new and risky places----he recently suggested we setup a “meeting” in a bar that is “out of town”. He wants me to dress sexy and be in the bar alone and he wants to come in and “pick me up” (as if I am a stranger). While I find this exciting, I am wondering if in the back of his mind he DOES want a stranger.