Birth control questions

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by DazzleKitty, Dec 12, 2010.

  1. DazzleKitty

    DazzleKitty New Member

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    Hey everyone,

    I am brand new here. So hello, everyone.

    I've only had sex four times in my life, and they weren't great (twice I was pressured/coerced into it, and the other two times were with someone I didn't like).

    I have been seeing a guy for two years and from the beginning he told me that sex should be saved for marriage. Well, we almost broke up recently and I told him that I just couldn't want anymore for sex. I feel as though being 23 and likely not getting any kind of intimacy for years since he is taking his time progressing, I can't do it anymore. I cannot wait. Either he gives it to me, or I will find someone who will and we will go our separate ways. He told me that he has been really thinking of changing his mind recently. He's been more bold too in certain ways, so I think he's serious.

    I would really like to have sex without condoms, as the idea of that is a turn on for me. I'd like him to cum inside. I have been on birth control for two years now. My mom told me it should definitely work against getting me pregnant since my period is perfectly regular on it. She said if you have breakthrough bleeding and an erratic period on the pill, it's likely not working. Is this true?

    I take my pill everyday but the time varies. I've heard from some you need to take it at the same exact time each day for it to work but then others have said that's not necessary. Some days I'll take it at 4:30PM in the afternoon, then other days not till 11PM. It depends on my work schedule. Can it still work even with the flip-flopping times of taking it?

    What kind of luck have all of you had with the pill and unprotected sex? I'm be VERY freaked out if I got pregnant. I really don't want to have kids at all, if you want the truth.

    Any advice is greatly appreciated. I know this question has probably been asked before, but I wanted to ask it too and explain my situation with it.

    Thanks in advance.
     
  2. blondi

    blondi Member

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    even the pill isnt fool proof and without a condom your chance of pregnancy goes up dramatically. but if that is what youre going to do, i would suggest using a spermicide. i like the one that comes in a can and makes the foam. you can get it at walmart or a pharmacy...im sure a lot of erotic stores would have it or online. like i said though, nothing is fool proof
     
  3. nyxx

    nyxx New Member

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    no birth control isn't 100% but like blondi said, if you combine different methods like the pill and spermicides you will decrease the chance of not getting pregnant. the only way not to get pregnant is to not have sex.

    as for the different times, i don't know if its the same, but the reason why they say to take medication same time everyday is because the dosage usually lasts for a certain time period in your body. like, if it says take 1 pill every 3 hours, its because after 3 hours the strength of the pill will be reduced to minimal effectiveness. So you take another to boost it. If the birth control pill is similar to that, then roughly the same time everyday would be the safest bet.
     
  4. lbushwalker

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    Hi DK, these days OC is very low dose so it is very important to take regularly for maximal protection against ovulating.
    Try to get into a habit of taking it at exactly the same time each day for example when you brush your teeth in the morning or evening.
    On that basis you should be ok.
    As for your guy; suggest you be very frank with him as to your needs.
    If he won't (or can't) then it's time to move on.
    Good luck!
     
  5. SexToyPalace

    SexToyPalace New Member

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    Hello!
    Just my 2 cents, but have you tried tracking your cycle?
    If you know when you ovulate, all you have to do is wait 4 days after ovulation, and you can have unprotected sex until the first day of your period.
    99% effective. Failsafe. Every. Single. Time.
    Look up the Creighton Method, or any info on Natural Family Planning.
    (And no, it's not about having kids. lol)

    A woman is only fertile for 3-5 days out of the month. The rest of the time, there is no need for condoms or bc, or anything really. It's just a waste of money.

    You said that you have regular cycles, which is great! :D

    Here is an easy way to tell when you are ovulating:

    You know the middle of the month, when you get really horny, and just seem to be "wet" down there for little or almost no reason? That's it!
    And if you pay attention, you'll notice that 4 days afterwards, you are dry again.
    =Infertile for the rest of the month. :)

    I'm not just talking out of my butt here. I've been doing it for 2 years now. I have a regular cycle, like you.

    Well, there you go. :D

    Don't take my word for it, of course. Do your homework. :)

    And if you'd like to do that while on bc, that's fine too. (Although redundant. lol)

    Good luck with whatever you decide! :D
     
  6. Dragon_Fire

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    She shouldn't be ovulating at all on the Pill.

    DazzleKitty, if you are on the combined Pill, it allows for variations in the time of day you take it. If you are on the Mini-pill, you must take it a the same time everyday.
     
  7. outofmymind

    outofmymind Member

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    Are you prepared to have an abortion if the birth control fails? Go to planned parenthood and go over your options for birth control. Get you and him STD tested too, then agree to be monogamous with each other. If you are prepared to have an abortion, use birth control, get STD tested, then you are fine without using a condom. Just do those three things, that's being responsible if you ask me.
     
  8. DazzleKitty

    DazzleKitty New Member

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    I am very grateful for all the responses. I am on what I assume to be the minipill, but I may look into this 'combined pill' mentioned.

    I am 100% for abortion, so if it comes to that, I'll do it. But I'd rather avoid it at all costs. I heard abortions are painful.

    I have never even thought of spermicide! That's a great suggestion. I'm going to get some of that at the next opportunity.
     
  9. Texas_Red

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    IIRC "spermicide" doesn't really do anything. The most commonly used spermicide is nonoxynol-9. A study was done by the WHO back in like 2000 that concluded that nonoxynol-9 was pretty much useless both as a spermicide and as a protection against STDs/STIs.

    As for the pill, taken exactly as prescribed it is over 90% effective. Most things I've read place it between 90% and 99% effective. Condoms are less effective than that. SO really, going on statistics alone, the pill is only outclassed by abstinence, or at the least, avoiding vaginal intercourse.
     
  10. daver

    daver New Member

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    DazzleKitty, is it correct to assume that the 4 times you've had intercourse were prior to the current boyfriend? If so, you're saying that you've been in a monogamous relationship for 2 years. You also started taking the pill at about the same time that this relationship began - and yet you haven't yet had sex with this man?

    I'm not really sure what my point is... I don't want to assume too much. Obviously it appears that you've not just been hoping for sex with your boyfriend for the past 2 years, you've been preparing for it. Has he been aware of this? My guess is either that you and he don't communicate very well, or that you are very different people, and that you've been hoping against hope - going on 2 years now - that his change in attitude would be "just around the corner".

    There is something to be said for abstinence before marriage, but it only works when both partners are willing and happy about it. Unless your love for each other is immense, I think one of you is going to have to come around to the other's point of view pretty soon.
     
  11. EscortBunny69

    EscortBunny69 New Member

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    I would suggest DK that you go to a family planning clinics and get proper advice as all pills do not work the same and also if you are sick/diarrhoea or on antibiotics this stops the pill working 100%.

    or see you local doctors nurse they are very helpful :)
     
  12. blondi

    blondi Member

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    i know spermicide wont work against stds, im just currious where youre getting your stats from TR. i really try not to speak of what i know not and the stats i found on various reliable med sites (mayoclinic and local planned parrenthood) suggested that spermicide can be up to 80% effective if used alone as dirrected and more so with other birthcontrol methods. you are correct on the pill, but i believe condoms come in at 95% if used correctly and it doesnt break. please dont misunderstand, im not trying to argue, i just dont want to end up in the pregnancy boat if what youre saying is valid 0.0
     
  13. Texas_Red

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    Cited in the Wikipedia article on nonoxynol-9, the WHO/CONRAD Technical Consultation on Nonoxynol-9:
    Now granted the same Wikipedia article does also state:
    but it also has [citation needed] after it. There is no reference to cite this info from, and so no way to know if it is factual or not.

    Add to this it has also been found nonoxynol-9 may actually increase your chances of STD/STI in that it can cause lesions inside the vagina.

    Here is a link to the actual Wikipedia article: Clicky

    And no worries blondi, I don't mean to create an argument either. This is done entirely to make sure we have as much factual info as possible, as it benefits all of us. I'd definitely be interested in reading what Mayo Clinic and Planned Parenthood have to say on it.
     
  14. blondi

    blondi Member

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    eh, wikipedia....its a start i guess. ok, honestly, spermicide has been found to degrade the integrity of condoms...so i wouldnt suggest using one that comes with it, separately if thats the combo you want...here is mayoclinic Spermicide - MayoClinic.com and here is planned parenthood Spermicide Effectiveness - Spermicides now, given, this is if you use it perfectly every time. and yes, spermicide can cause irritation of the vaginal canal including lessions in extreme cases, ive never had a problem in 6 months of pretty regular use. im pretty sure thats what spermicide does though, basically disolve the poor little swimmers...ill try to find a journal article, pm me if youre interested lol i think we've derailed the thread enough ^^