Are you self-conscious about your body?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by sensless, Sep 15, 2017.

  1. Lovnflman

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 29, 2015
    Messages:
    668
    Likes Received:
    713
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Florida
    Sometimes I do.....sometimes I don't. I was always a skinny kid growing up, and when I had that growth spurt to 6'1" my soph yr in HS it got worse. Felt like a lanky nerd! Finally got my weight up to 160 pounds and it's been that way for the last 38 years. I'm thin, but in shape, and my chest still sticks out farther than my stomach.

    Since college I've been in four LTRs, and I remember the first time I was naked with each I didn't think twice about it. I loved being naked with them, in and out of bed.

    Now having been with the Mrs for 20+ years I don't have a problem being shirtless or naked. Sometimes the softening of my mid section has me thinking I should put a shirt on, but it's summer in Florida and I do a lot of yard work, and I say heck with it.
     
    sensless likes this.
  2. Ryan4chat

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 14, 2016
    Messages:
    1,304
    Likes Received:
    3,853
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    You are very stunning n have a beautiful gallery of images that teasing show how sexy you are. :oops: It's true that everyone is their own worst critic, whether it be their looks, their skills , their voice :rolleyes:, etc.
    People just see you, your beauty, your unique witty fun personality. :p Sometimes we have to ignore all those thoughts n self conscious struggles, be ourselves n smile.

    It's like when someone makes you feel sexy or happy, suddenly the little things that were bothering you feel quite insignificant.
    :D
     
    sensless likes this.
  3. Kurio

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2016
    Messages:
    365
    Likes Received:
    444
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    I'm very conscious of the way I look and genuinely hate what I see. I don't feel comfortable at all in my own skin and I am far from comfortable being naked. I haven't been with anyone for a long time so being seen naked around someone isn't really an issue for me at the moment but I know the way I feel about myself would prevent that.

    I can't say there is any specific reason behind this it's a more a case of that feeling building over time but I think on some level I've always felt the same, ashamed of the way I look. In part its internal I think, linked to a fairly severe level of depression. It's fair to say that over the years the things I've been called and the way people have spoken of me has helped enforce that feeling. That many people can't be wrong I suppose. Now I just keep myself out of the way of others. That is about more than just how I feel about my appearance but it is a factor for me.
     
    sensless likes this.
  4. Mywife4u

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    549
    Likes Received:
    1,077
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Chicago Illinois
    Neither my wife or I are self conscious about are bodies. I think a great thing for everybody to do is go to a nudist resort for a week. You will lose your inhabitions and become comfortable with whatever body type you are.
     
    graydeck57 and sensless like this.
  5. MOBiGuy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2017
    Messages:
    112
    Likes Received:
    184
    Gender:
    Male
    Thanks for your nice words. For me, it is mostly by choice right now that I'm not looking for someone to be with. Also work evenings and in the small town I live in, there isn't anyplace to go out and meet people during the day. I have looked at on-line dating but most women seem to want men that can be with them in the evenings and I can't do that because of work. I also have some health issues and don't feel that it would be fair to someone else to deal with me on some of the days that I don't feel well because of the issues. Maybe someday, I will feel different about this and try to meet someone, but for now I'll just be by myself.
     
    sensless likes this.
  6. sensless

    sensless Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2015
    Messages:
    3,493
    Likes Received:
    5,974
    Gender:
    Female
    Many people may be wrong! What is appearance, after all? Most of it is just your genes. You're so much more than that.

    Perhaps you've been around insecure people who needed to belittle you to make themselves feel better. That's so common!

    Please, don't let the past dictate your future. It can be better than what you think.

    It's difficult, complicate and hard to feel better when you've been depressed for so long. But it is possible.
     
    sankay, Kurio and Mywife4u like this.
  7. sensless

    sensless Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2015
    Messages:
    3,493
    Likes Received:
    5,974
    Gender:
    Female
    I hope you get better soon.

    I don't know what problem you have, but consider a support group. Other people in your situation who can relate and support you.
     
  8. Kurio

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2016
    Messages:
    365
    Likes Received:
    444
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    The past may not dictate the future but it does inform it and sometimes points the way ahead. For me I've been depressed for longer than I can remember, it's my natural state of being.

    You are right, appearance isn't everything but all the bad inside shows through to my outside.
     
    sensless likes this.
  9. sensless

    sensless Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 2, 2015
    Messages:
    3,493
    Likes Received:
    5,974
    Gender:
    Female
    Words on an Internet forum won't magically bring you out of this dark, dark place where you've been for so long.

    I'm so sorry we can't really help you. I can only send you a hug and let you know that people care.

    You've been there for like forever, but that still doesn't necessarily mean you can't get out. I hope you try. Again and again. It's excruciatingly hard, but so it is where you are.

    I'll keep "liking" your posts. It doesn't mean I'm liking that you're depressed! I mean it as a hug. Every time.
     
    HazHardHat, lbushwalker and Lovnflman like this.
  10. whybother

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 27, 2015
    Messages:
    6,006
    Likes Received:
    9,872
    Gender:
    Male
    I am self conscious, about my lack of a masculine body. I'm not muscular, my penis is on the small side, I have never felt that I was sexy. I have always felt like the guy that women wanted to be friends with but didn't want to fuck.
     
    sensless likes this.
  11. learning1234

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 29, 2017
    Messages:
    93
    Likes Received:
    120
    Gender:
    Male
    Yes I feel my cock is a little small and being uncut
     
    sensless likes this.
  12. graydeck57

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 29, 2016
    Messages:
    380
    Likes Received:
    338
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    SE PA
    I agree. I used has issues. To heavy, penis size etc. I always enjoyed being naked at home, then I decided to try social nudity. Took a lot of courage to cross that threshold but I did. After seeing others naked, I realized that most bodies are not perfect. I found out that people judged you as a person not what life scars that you carry. So at this stage of my life, I feel very good about my body and myself. Yes, I could lose some more weight but that is something that I am working on.
     
    Mywife4u and sensless like this.
  13. Goodgirl73

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2017
    Messages:
    6
    Likes Received:
    799
    Gender:
    Female
    Am typically never happy with my figure, my looks anything. Some of it stems from the ending of my 21 year marriage, some of it just from always. My current guy loves my body but I wish I could lose the 10 lbs I put back on in the last year. Have always thought my hips are too big my boobs too small, thighs too heavy..
    It doesn't typically affect sex for me but it ca n at time keep me from wanting to be totally naked.
    I try to be happy with what I have but it's a struggle in my head at times.
     
  14. HazHardHat

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2015
    Messages:
    2,125
    Likes Received:
    2,778
    Gender:
    Male
    Thanks for sharing your honest thoughts @Goodgirl73 I think we all have insecurities about our bodies, even those in tip top shape probably have some. But from an outsider's perspective, I took a look at your profile and photo and I can honestly say you look fantastic! Keep doing what you are doing because you look beautiful. Hope you are having fun at SF and thanks again for sharing :)
     
    JackieTreehorn and Goodgirl73 like this.
  15. MadamBusty

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2013
    Messages:
    627
    Likes Received:
    1,541
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Somewhere on Earth
    Verified:
    Photo
    This depends on my mood and who i am with. if its someone i know well enough and doesnt mind my wobbly bits then i will bare all. if im feeling uncomfortable with my body then i hide it and noone gets to see it and i usually feel that im less sexy then other women which i really shouldnt worry about
     
    sensless, MrRam65 and alex93977 like this.
  16. DayPlay3

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2015
    Messages:
    8,525
    Likes Received:
    7,881
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago
    @Goodgirl73
    Just perv'd your profile pics...you look great in that pic.
    :D
     
  17. fairlthick

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2015
    Messages:
    9,647
    Likes Received:
    14,407
    Gender:
    Male
    The older I get, the less sexy I feel. I used to be a workout freak but working 7 days a week at my age is taking a toll on my energy and my body. It's time to get my ass on the fitness train again. ;)
     
    Dog_E_Ryder and sensless like this.
  18. AJR23

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2017
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    344
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Missouri , USA
    Only certain parts... I hate my as and legs.
    I love my stomach and chest, arms, dick.
     
    sensless likes this.
  19. mikehoncho18

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2016
    Messages:
    641
    Likes Received:
    1,286
    Gender:
    Male
    In general I don't have big issues, but we all have some insecurities, it's human.

    I was never a skinny kid, and at some point even let myself gain more weight than I should have. Thankfully I put the weight off but little things stay with you at times.
     
    sensless and MadamBusty like this.
  20. cook74

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2007
    Messages:
    4,510
    Likes Received:
    7,666
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Sydney, Australia
    I was tall and skinny growing up but never really minded as it helped me in the boxing ring and even with sparring heavier guys I would still have a good reach. Doing such a sport from a young age till my early 20s helped me with my confidence even when people teased me about being tall and lanky. But now I am in my 40s and my metabolism is not so great I am putting on weight around my belly and that makes me feel a little self conscious when it comes to stripping down in front of others. Even in the work change rooms I suck my belly in a bit....
     
    sensless likes this.