Are We Abnormal?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Barbwire, Aug 27, 2007.

  1. Barbwire

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    Are we abnormal? I mean, people like us that actually enjoy sex, want to have more of it, and want to discuss it... are we the exception to the rule? The more I talk to folks in the "real world" about sex, or at least attempt to, the more I realize I am somewhat of an oddity.

    A few weeks ago, I was camping with some women, and I brought up sex and they pretty much all gawked at me, said they didn't like it, and changed the topic ASAP. It's not just this particular group, either. I have found that it's almost impossible to talk about sex to anyone I encounter.

    I understand people feeling that they can't add to the conversation, but for them to make me feel like some kind of freak for even bringing it up, really bothers me. Even my nieces, who are in their 20's give me the cold shoulder if I mention the dreaded, "S" word.

    I am thankful I can come here to discuss things, but I still wish I could talk to people face to face and not be made to feel like some kind of degenerate. Do you know what I'm saying?

     
  2. MikeHardwood

    MikeHardwood New Member

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    I don't think we are abnormal at all. I would think we tend to be better adjusted with who we are, and don't harbor the suppressed feelings that others suffer.
     
  3. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    You must live in the bible belt.
    Was you camping with a church group.
    Actually it's true that most people don't know
    what to say when the topic of fucking comes up
    so they tend to clam up and avoid the subject.
    Some guys are afraid of the sex topic also because
    they are afraid we will think they are queer if
    they talk about sex.

    Hiker
     
  4. Barbwire

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    There is no bible belt north of the Mississippi, just a bunch of godless heathens. :dgrin

    No, the women I was camping with were a pretty progressive bunch, I thought.
     
  5. igor

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    It's the "other people" that are abnormal. Maybe some things are private but sex is one of the most natural acts we do (like eating for example).
     
  6. MikeHardwood

    MikeHardwood New Member

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    And sometimes both of those at the same time! :lol
     
  7. heelfetish

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    I've found that outside this group, I can't discuss sex with anyone else. Is it too private? Too something? *shrug* I dunno. But I do like being able to chat with everyone here, and hearing about other peoples' issues and concerns.
     
  8. Joe

    Joe
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    I think *sex* is a very private topic for most people. I discuss details of my personal sex life here because I can be somewhat anonymous. I probably could open up a bit with friends now, but 15 years ago I wouldn't have. Up until then I was in a non-sexual marriage, but I didn't think that was anyone's business but my own. Back then a close friend of mine once asked me about sex after marriage because he was having problems with his own marriage; I made a joke of it and laughed it off. I've felt guilty about that ever since. But I still consider it somewhat a private topic.

    My late wife was the opposite, maybe more like you. After my 80-year-old parents were here for a short visit, she told me all about the "sex talk" she'd had with my mother. I couldn't believe she had actually asked Mom about her sex life and told her about our sex life. That was her. She was very comfortable with it. I got that way too, after a couple years, but now I've reverted back a little.
     
  9. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    The guys i have known in real life seem to get embarressed a lot with the topic of sex .....but a lot of the females i have known seem to be more inclined towards talking about sex ....

    I think as some have said before with other topics that have been close t othis , it is down to how you were either raised as a child or how open your first bunch of freinds were an certain topics....as a kid i was always playing kiss chase or doctors and nurses.....
     
  10. Dreama

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    If I'm abnormal for enjoying my own body, and the body of my fiance, then that's fucked up. I wish people wouldn't get so freaked out about talking of sex....I mean, it really makes things hard for the inexperienced to get information from people (such as my parents) who were never willing to talk about such things with me.
     
  11. deckard_cain

    deckard_cain New Member

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    Abnormality, I am finding, is more and more advantageous than normality. I would rather not be like other people, as many people regret life, rather than enjoying it. Its hard sometimes to fight against the social programming coming at me constantly, what is acceptable and what is not, but I will do my best to only appear to fit in.

    :)
     
  12. vampire raver

    vampire raver New Member

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    I wasn't really raised to hate sex but to respect it and from then on I pretty much branched off and learned as much as I possibly could about it. I have noticed that a lot of people don't understand sex. It is like any other subject you have to read and practice what you learn.

    So yes, I think we may be in the minority especially in the USA, however look at Japan they are very open about sex and the also respect it.

    I think if more people respected or were taught to respect sex then it would be a more open subject.
     
  13. Buffalo204

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    I'm pretty sure I'm abnormal. I look at my life and all the places I've been and things I've done and yes I'm abnormal. I think I was born without the little voice that tells you "this is not a good idea". In any case I don't care. Normal people are boring for the most part. A bit crazy is good.:dgrin
     
  14. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    I was crazy insain, and insain crazy as a teen up till my mid to late 20's then i calmed down ....i think i was on a road to ruin in a big hurry at that stage of my life....

    drugs drink crime and the streets, something had to change...in ways im glad i found that little voice inside me.


    but wouldnt change very much at all from before that time though.
     
  15. torridsex

    torridsex New Member

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    Yea, I'm with you on this one. The last time I was out on the girls night out and told them that my libido was for no apparent reason rampant. They said I could not be around their husbands because they had convienced them that it's normal that no
    women over 40 really wants sex much and they were not for talking about it
    very much. Sheesh, but if I start talking too much - then I'm wanting it more!:dgrin
     
  16. Bluesy

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    Oh, hey, I think I'd break out in a cold sweat and start jabbering incoherently if my aunt tried to initiate a conversation about sex :nerv It's a bit...icky...talking about sex with family members, so their reaction is only to be expected. I've made vague comments to my mom from time to time, in an attempt to gauge her comfort level with the subject, and she always winces and gets fidgety, changes the subject...*sigh*. That's the lone exception to my family rule: I think it's nice when moms and daughters are able to talk about sex.

    I've had some really fun, laugh-out-loud, down-and-dirty convos about sex with women friends. The single ones are more open about it, from my experience. Women in relationships seem to be more closed-mouthed about their sex lives, and I actually don't blame them. I think it's kinda tacky when people share the intimate details of their love lives when you know their partner. I don't want to know what size dick soandso's husband has, or what kinds of noises he makes in the bedroom :ugh It's really difficult for partnered people to discuss sex without oversharing. I wouldn't want a partner disclosing details of our sex life to his buddies, that's for sure!

    I'll just say this: Thank goodness we have a place like :sf to come to, where we can air all our sexual laundry, and be as explicit as we want without offending anyone :D
     
  17. aussiebloke

    aussiebloke New Member

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    Maybe it's an age/generational thing, maybe it's a geographical thing, I don't know. But if I could offer my southern-hemispherian-young-adult perspective, certainly the vast majority of people around my age that I talk to are open about discussing sex. Stating the obvious, my male friends are part of this group - but also a lot of the girls that I talk to on a regular basis. This isn't talking about sex in an interested-in-each-other kinda way either; just casually about what's going on in our sex lives with our current partners.
     
  18. dressd2dpress

    dressd2dpress New Member

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    Nope, not at all. We are just the way nature intended us to be. The reason it seems so abnormal is that religion has taught us that sex is wrong and should be discouraged. It has taught us that the human body is something to be disgusted by, not enjoyed. IMHO, the religious leaders back in the day realized the same thing that those guys that go on and on about how huge their dicks are have realized; women enjoy it to. With that in mind, they used religion to keep women from wanting it, thus preventing their unsatisfied wives from going to another man for her pleasure.
     
  19. RedHotLady

    RedHotLady New Member

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    No..I don't think we are abnormal at all...we are just doing what nature intended us to do.
    I honestly think its the other way around..people who are not as open are the abnormal ones, IMO :D
     
  20. cook74

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    Personally, I rarely encounter a problem when wanting to discuss any aspect of sex with my friends. My closest friends even talk about their sexcapades in front of my partner, which makes her a little paranoid as to what I am discussing with them about us.:mad

    None of us are shy amongst ourselves, when it comes to the topic of sex but I guess we have pretty much grown up together.

    We can discuss problems, techniques etc in the most sordid detail:eek. I love that freedom of discussion, even though at times, especially in our youth, a lot of BS was bandied about.:jerkit