Apology porn

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by nicelynoosed, Jun 26, 2015.

  1. nicelynoosed

    nicelynoosed Member

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    I've often thought that one could sell a good many products to ladies of a female persuasion with an ad that works as follows:

    [Fade in to neutral background and hunky man in foreground. Different races/styles should be represented for the length of the campaign. Shirts optional]

    (Voiceover)
    At (company name) we don't have a lot to apologize for, so we had this man do it instead.

    [Guy looks directly into the camera earnestly and dreamily and clearly apologetically]

    GUY: I totally screwed up. I wish I had thought about what I was saying more. You don't deserve to have to deal with that, and I wish I hadn't upset you so much. (Etc, etc)

    ***

    This is not the chauvinist premise that it may at first appear to be. I think there are just SO MANY things about women that we men either ignore or fail to comprehend. I've often noted that my wife goes through more discomfort getting ready for work than I am likely to experience all week. So, when we disagree and I finally get enough of my head extracted to see things from her point of view, I tend to realize that I've been something of a petulant, irrational butt-head.

    So, what are some things for which the men in these ads could apologize? Not understanding the torturous kabuki necessary to prepare for an evening out? Merely signing a valentine card clearly bought at a gas station? Laundry? Dishes? Blowjobs?

    I'm awfully curious, thanks!

    NN
     
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  2. Erariga_Viro

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    A few blunders I've made...
    "I'm really sorry when you said you were having a bad week that I asked, 'Is it that time for you?'"
    "I feel sincere regret that you had a terrible day and I insisted on going out with the guys instead of staying home with you."
     
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  3. HotForHoney

    Gold Member

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    I don't want a prepackaged store bought apology. It should come from his heart.
     
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  4. lbushwalker

    Gold Member

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    Got drunk last night,sorry you don't drink but thanks for taking me home in my piss sodden pants ;)
    I feel even more sorry this morning :)
     
  5. lbushwalker

    Gold Member

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    Ps: it was my send off party after all so sorry about that too :(
     
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  6. CLE32793

    Verified Gold Member

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    Sorry I shot my cum up your nose. :( lol
     
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  7. BlueCollar

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    I'm sorry I shot cum into your new stereo speaker.
    Whoops. :cool:
     
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  8. nicelynoosed

    nicelynoosed Member

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    Darling, it's been terrible without you.

    These past few days have been like torture. I didn't know how much you mean to me, how much you inspire and encourage me until now. I didn't see all the ways that you help to keep me on track, centered, and focused. I've been in a tailspin without you here, and can tell that life without you is just one big, depressed mess.

    This morning I woke up on the sofa wearing only my bathrobe, with beer cans and cigarette butts all around me. I hadn't shaved in days and smelled like a skunk. It was no way to behave in IKEA.

    Please, come back to me.
     
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  9. Barent

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    I'm sorry that I got you upset by my arriving home four hours late, with half a bag on, and lipstick traces on my face. Next time, I'll be sure to clean myself up before you see me.
     
    #9 Barent, Jul 1, 2015
    Last edited: Jul 1, 2015
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  10. nicelynoosed

    nicelynoosed Member

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    Sweetheart, precious, love of my life, forgive me.

    I'll admit that I was a bit overoptimistic. I'd had one or three bottles too many and that made me bolder than I should have been. Sometimes the hooch gives me optimism and courage that I normally temper with judgement and experience. What I tried was risky and potentially painful at the best of times, and my efforts were not well timed, just after an otherwise lovely wake. In my defense, the lighting was dim and I'd lost my glasses running around the block for what I still argue was a considerate lube run. It was just the wrong time to experiment with anal sex, and for that I am truly sorry. Please offer your sister my condolences again and explain that the two of you were, after all, dressed very similarly. Please come back to me.
     
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  11. lbushwalker

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    A fun thread except sadly my post was true at the time for which I am not too proud!
     
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