I have been with my wife since 1996. We have 2 daughters (17 and 12 yrs). We are both in our 40s. When we have sex it is always good but it is very rare for us to have intercourse. The last time was 2 months ago. She does wank me while we share fantasies...this happens 1 or 2 times a week but sometimes weeks go by without any contact. Once every 3 or 4 weeks she'll want me to make her cum. I want sex regularly...every day day or 2 but she doesnt. Every now and again I will try and talk but she says she doesnt realise how much time has passed and makes negative comments about me counting. She says she fancies me ... we love each other and she says that really enjoys sex with me. Inext to never get to see her naked any more. She is tired and stressed with work and travel and it used to lead to me feeling stressed and negative. Sometimes we go months with no sexual contact and if I say something it'll lead to an argument about me not understanding. The worst time was over 10 months which caused a lot of problems (5 yrs ago)...since then I have looked at porn films and pictures...I get to wank and see naked women...but I dont talk to her about this as I feel it makes me a bad husband. So my question is ... am I? She knows cos during thd 10 months with no contact she found a dvd I had...she was ok ish when I explained that I couldnt wank over her when she wanted no contact with me and I wanted/needed to hear dirty talk to cum...hence the dvd. Please be honest AND kind with your answers as I am unconfident of myself. Also please do not comment on ir judge my wife as she is lovinv in all other ways, a great friend, brilliant mum, really good company and is not having an affair. So am I a bad husband...cos sometimes I think I am for using porn to cum.