Hi, I don't think I could describe myself and my situation completely without writing an enormous thesis, so please don't assume too much as my situation seems very unique as am I. I'm a guy. Am very masculine externally, but very balanced psychologically. not ur average sports watching, beer drinking type, more artistic and philosophical. I have internally sides that are very masculine, but some also that I find mostly in women. I'm extremely straight and have never experimented with homosexuality or even had one second of desire to try it. I've been in a relationship for 3 years, living together for one. Sexually, have quite a bit of friction currently. I've been in many relationships, but not many longer than 6 months. The sex has always always great, never had a complaint for my performance, I'm very giving, very well endowed, and could always deliver multiple orgasms. My problem is in my balanced side. Personality and non-sexual behavior of the other usually effects my sexual desires quite a bit. When life begins to settle in a relationship and you have to deal with other elements of a persons personality and behavior, and I get taken for granted, or someone behaves selfishly, or acts negatively, it greatly effects my sexual desire for the other person. At this point I can still become aroused but can not orgasm. Sex feels about as orgasm inspiring as washing dishes. For a guy this is difficult because you can't fake an orgasm and are forced to deal with the reality. I have discussed this with my partner, and the things that are turn offs for me, but they seem to make her selfconscious, and insecure about herself, and that seems to add to the problem, as the insecurity and lack of selfconfididence seem also to be a sexual turn off. Discussing our problems seems to make the efforts to fix them seem to make our behavior toward each other seem artificial, and again we're at some impass sexually. We get along great as pals. She orgasms fine. I don't. She feels self conscious about this, and the vicious circle continues. There's a lot more nuanced elements to this, and if you address this with an open mind and not presumutously, I will gladly try to give more details. I find my situation difficult because it seems more common for women to be on this side of the fence then men. I have more elements of my psychi such as a need for foreplay in order to orgasm, where she needs little or none and cums very quickly. There's a lot more to it all in this but these are the basics, and the big wedge issues. I know that's a lot to chew on, but any concerned, constructive, and empathetic/sympathetic advice welcomed.