9 months and she won't give me head...

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by norstar36, Mar 23, 2010.

  1. norstar36

    norstar36 New Member

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    What's up everyone...

    I've got this great girlfriend. We click in just about every way. been together nine months now and I don't want to break up with her BUT...

    She won't freaking give me a blow job! She won't even go down on me unless I kind of force the issue and then its lick lick one slurp with teeth involved and then she wants to get to the main course.

    On the other hand she never stops me from eating her out in my talented, selfless way, or fingering her into multiple writhing Os...I got her a couple vibes about 5 months ago and she ALWAYS makes sure they're near proximity for us to play with...

    Is it me or is this woman selfish? She's mid 20s I'm mid 30s,well hung and clean, attractive and fit...I've confronted her about it and she says she's not really into it- oh but she's all about getting hers.

    Advice, comments or anything else from both men and women are gladly welcomed!:ugh
     
  2. Hot Wheels

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    You could always try getting into a 69 position when oral time comes around..... then tell her that whatever you get...she gets...:eyes
     
  3. north

    north New Member

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    Sorry to state the obvious but it sounds like she clearly doesn't want to. If I were a guy, I can't imagine enjoying oral sex at all if the person performing it on me wasn't into it, let alone totally disinclined to do it.
     
  4. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    And it's just that simple.

    And when she digs it...oh my, oh my.
     
  5. TheMotion

    TheMotion New Member

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    Honey, our sexual relationship is unbalanced, outside my mainstream expectations, and not meeting my needs. Bye."

    Wanna post "35 years and she won't give me head"?
    Many relatiosnhips end over one thing. This is your one thing. And it probably suggests other things.
     
  6. igor

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    I can beat that - how about 47 years?
     
  7. HardRocker

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    I don't think it's a contest.

    Norstar, I hope she tries to learn to overcome her distaste to it since she knows you want it. I'm sure it can be an acquired taste, especially if something happened in the past that put her off, such as being skullfucked in a aggressive way. Whenever she does give it a try, I would suggest you being completely passive and let her control everything including intensity and depth.

    Maybe she'll warm up to it eventually. Between now and then, just remember, there are more important things she could hate doing, so try not to obsess too much over it. That's about the best I have to offer at the moment.
     
  8. Northside

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    I once dated a girl who was adamant that she didn't suck dick. She had huge boobs and was a really cool girl so I was fine with it. I didn't want to push it and make her uncomfortable. She was a great fuck so I let her be comfortable with her own limits. The funny part is one night she told me she had changed her mind. I think most people want to do things that are their own idea and not feel coerced into doing something they aren't ready for.
     
  9. FlirtyChick

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    Well you say she is a great girlfriend, so you get extra credit for that, but you used the word confront in describing your talk with her about it. Did you confront her as is "Why don't you want to suck my dick?", or did you go about it caringly and gently?

    Communicating your needs to her is essential. You should strive to find out why she isn't into it, then ask if she would like to try to overcome her fear/aversion. It's ok for her to not like it, and you may have to just enjoy your sexual relationship with her without getting head. I don't see her as selfish at all. I think you are just a tad frustrated because you work so hard to please her and you may feel like she is not doing the same thing. That's natural and ok as well.

    I personally love to give blow jobs, but it is an acquired talent and like. Ask yourself this: Is everything else about her, sexual and non-sexual, awesome enough for you to forego getting blown for the remainder of the relationship? Sex is very important for couples, but it is not the most important aspect of being together. I would rather be in a great relationship with so so sex than in a so so relationship with great sex. I can have great sex all by myself! ;)

    Perhaps you can ask her for a great hand job. Tell her how turned on you will be if she blows ya with gentle instructions from you......

    Good luck!
     
  10. north

    north New Member

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    Well said, Chick! :)
     
  11. Barbwire

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    I had a bad experience being forced to blow a man when I was young and it scarred me deeply. I started having sex when I was 19 and had a huge amount of baggage that kept me from enjoying giving blowjobs. I took me a very long time and a few very patient lovers to overcome my fears and to finally truly love worshipping my partner's cock with my mouth.

    I'm not saying that your girlfriend had anything like that happen to her, what I'm saying is, you just have to be patient with her. Things may turn around as your girlfriend, and your relationship with her matures.


    Oh, just a thought...I may be pissin' in the wind but, I couldn't help but notice that you classify yourself as "well hung", norstar. Exactly what are you packin'? Maybe that has something do to with her reluctance to go down on you.

    PS: Check out this thread, you might find it helpful. http://www.sexualforums.com/6475-question-women-who-used-hate.html
     
    #11 Barbwire, Mar 26, 2010
    Last edited: Mar 26, 2010
  12. FlirtyChick

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    Thank you dear!
     
  13. JefferyA

    JefferyA New Member

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    Like Cowboy... was stating, I think some women have a lot of "baggage" and it it hasn't been dealt with(or even if it has) - they might not want to participate in some activities such as oral sex. Or, maybe they aren't interested/never were in it at all in the first place. I think a partner "goes along" with a lover to satisfy him/her and then later on in the relationship state a dissatisfaction with a sex act.

    This is kind a bummer for the person on the "receiving end", when this point comes.
    It is kind of like the partner wants the lover to want to be with them, then when the lover commits to the relationship - the partner doesn't see that they "need" to perform oral sex anymore. This seems deceitful in a way, and maybe it is. Oh well, such is the way people operate sometimes.

    Bummer, you aren't the only one who has gone through this!
     
  14. DStud

    DStud New Member

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    Some girls just don't like it, Like I would never want to go down on a girl, I did it once and was not what I fought. Maybe she had a bad experience.

    Some girls I played with just have this "thing" about coming down on ya..
    I would try to get to the true reason..