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Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by bighiker2003, Feb 10, 2008.
Did everyone give up on marriage or what.
It seems to be an ever increasing trend in many countries. I think that these days couples have to work extra hard together to make their relationship work.
Oh well...I think I'm ready :nerv
That number doesn't surprise me, when you think that half of all marriages end in divorce that makes for a heck of a lot of single people left over. I would have guessed that number was closer to 75 million.
Well, you have to examine that statistic a little further. In the US, 18 and older is considered an adult, and there are probably millions of 18, 19, and 20 year-olds who are not married yet. There are probably millions of older people who's spouses have died, etc. You can't just assume that 50 million single adults automatically means 50 million divorces.
Besides, 50 million is less than one sixth of the population.
If people get married, they get married later in life (and I'm including de-facto as married, because in my country half of couples are not married).
In the generation before me, marriage opened the door to sexual expression, and to some extent people of my age carried on the tradition of marriage, even though sex before marriage was normal behaviour. Today things have gone one step further, and sexual expression is through a series of boyfriends / girlfriends until the time is right and the financial issues have been dealt with and they have done some overseas travel and so on.
So they are single, but they aren't alone.
Look at this forum for example: most of the questions come from 18-19-20 year-olds and sexual issues with their bfs or gfs.
I'm twenty and married, and my husband is also twenty. Sure, it's a bit young, but I'm sure there are plenty of us. And, there are plenty of people who aren't getting married, simply because they don't feel like it or aren't ready. Society no longer puts as much emphasis on getting married, and it's giving people the freedom to do what is right for them.
Plus we have no way of knowing if those 50 million "single" people include those who are in committed long-term relationships with their partners, but not legally married.
Actually the divorce rate in the US is on the decline and has been since 1999
And that decline is he result of less people getting married.
Yeah, I am certain that many of those people are in long term relationships, and it's a shame that does not get taken into consideration.
There was segment about this very topic on "60 Minutes" last night. I was surprised at some of the facts I heard. The divorce rate doubled from 1960 to 1980, but has not changed since. There are fewer teen marriages these days. Also, the average age of couples marrying in the USA is 26 for women, 27 for men. Another factoid I gathered was, second marriages have a higher divorce date than first ones.
My SO and I fall into this category. we have been together 11 yrs and are not married. Indiana as far as i know does not have a common law marriage either. we have planned on getting married before. like just going to the court house or something. but it seems that every time we get ready to go something interferes with it and we dont end up getting married. so we have sat down and talked and decided that we are great the way we are. if its not broke dont fix it is our motto now. our situation works for us.
Okay, the lack of common-law marriage in parts of the US means a lot. So there's a lot of couples living together as married, but classified as single! In Australia there are two levels of married: de-facto and legally. At the moment the legal marriage rate is climbing, and it seems our current economic prosperity is fuelling the boom. So if couples are in love and feeling secure about the future, they are more likely to commit for the long-term.
I'm a bit old-fashioned. I think if you love someone enough to live with them, you love them enough to marry them.
The stats you saw echo my posting to a degree. In years past, to have a sexual realtionship couples had to get married as teens. Now couples have a choice, which is better. Some of those teen marriages didn't have much long-term future.
This is why I am dead-set against the US push for abstinence (although such a push won't ever happen in my country). Abstinence encourages inappropriate marriages and high divorce rates.
Some choose not to get married, not because they don't love each other, but because it's much more convenient for both to not get married. Unless there is a practical reason besides love, why do it? My hubby and I loved each other very much, and when we got married, we definitely wanted to. But, we had some good practical reasons for doing so, too.