22 year old female, too many sex partners?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Xes1990, Feb 12, 2013.

?

How many is too many?

Poll closed Feb 17, 2013.
  1. 3

    1 vote(s)
    5.6%
  2. 4

    1 vote(s)
    5.6%
  3. 5

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. 6

    3 vote(s)
    16.7%
  5. 7

    2 vote(s)
    11.1%
  6. 8

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  7. 9

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  8. 10

    2 vote(s)
    11.1%
  9. 11

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  10. 12

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  11. 13

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  12. 14

    2 vote(s)
    11.1%
  13. 15

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  14. 16

    1 vote(s)
    5.6%
  15. 17 or more

    6 vote(s)
    33.3%
  1. Xes1990

    Xes1990 New Member

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    I've had 19 sexual partners, and I feel like that's way too many. Basically I'm trying to come to peace with the number of guys I've slept with in my past. Can anyone help me?
     
  2. lbushwalker

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    Why do you need help?
    You have wide ranging experience in a short time so what?
    Some may have been meaningful others obviously not but that was your personal choice.
    I've had 21 in a lifetime which is not many in terms of years but in the time frame they mostly occurred it might have matched yours.
    Do not denigrate yourself for having experimented but keep it to yourself with your lover whom you might want to make it last, or at least at the beginning.
    Be at peace with yourself Xes1990, and remember you are a good person, ok :)
     
  3. AGFUNK

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    I really wouldn't worry about the number of people you've slept with. I'm 23 and have slept with close to or over 80 people. I'm not ashamed of that number. I've gotten lots of experience.
     
  4. lovethewife

    lovethewife New Member

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    Did you have fun? That is what is important. My wife was experienced before we met and I am so glad
     
  5. GreyGoose

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    Be safe and have fun why worry what others think
     
  6. lovethewife

    lovethewife New Member

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    I agree.
     
  7. Clintriprock

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    If it's bothering you then change your sexual habits until you're comfortable. As guy I'd be lying if I said I didn't care how many partners my wife has had.
     
  8. Anotherday

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    Be safe, have fun, and don't worry what others think. If you aren't comfortable with yourself however, make a few changes in your lifestyle.
     
  9. almostthere

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    Couldnt take the poll cause no number is too many. As long as you respect yourself and are safe, who cares how many. Ive only had a couple dozen and that was between the age of 16 to 25. After i got married it shrank to one,and its still the same one.
     
  10. backcheck64

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    I had 47 by the time I was 18. Found "her" on number 47 and been there ever since...30 yrs now. As long as you're using protection, you've got nothing to worry about.
     
  11. MordsithLove

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    Here I am at age 24, and still on number 2....

    My life just got REALLY boring and inexperienced.
     
  12. Dragon_Fire

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    Some rare people fall for their childhood sweetheart and NEVER had any one else. Doesn't mean they've led a boring life. Who knows what experiments they've tried on one another.


    There is no right number to have slept with. The only thing to be worried about is if any of those partners used or abused you. Otherwise if you were happy enough at the time, there's nothing to come to peace with.
     
  13. lbushwalker

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    Quantity does not equate to quality of experience. One night stands could never equal the intimacy or mutual understanding of a committed relationship.
     
  14. Clintriprock

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    You're a jewel ;-)
     
  15. Anotherday

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    If any consolation, the wife was a virgin when we started dating. She was 24 then. I am still her only one, and she's anything but boring.
     
  16. MordsithLove

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    Maybe I was being a bit too sarcastic. I have my moments of wondering about what life could be if I was given the chance to explore my world as an adult, independent woman, and honestly it becomes an issue as I get older.

    The number of partners is not an issue as long as you're being safe, take care of yourself, don't loose respect for yourself nor let anyone disrespect you. That's what I believe, however the number of partners you've had is never something to brag about. Fine line there ;)
     
  17. sandwich

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    When you say "come to peace" are you referring to a personal moral dilemma or how guys will view you or how you've been treated on account of the 19, or is it something else? My answer might differ depending on your answer to this question.

    Stopping until you come to terms with whatever it is will definitely not hurt. It may give you clarity about some things.

    I did not answer the poll because in terms of myself, the number was not among the choices. For me, I think 2 is too many, and that's looking back to what I would do differently. At 30 I am having sex with my fourth and last (unless he dies first), and while I'm not big on regrets, I would have preferred to wait. (Yeah we're gonna get married...long story...will share on another thread when I'm ready to do so.). It's not a moral thing for me; it's just a Sandwich thing.

    He has had many partners, and I don't really want to know the number, not because the number would bother me, but because then I might start wondering about all sorts of things. I'm sure he knows my number because we've known each other for over four years, and it would have been easy for him to figure it out.

    What is too many for you is something you will have to figure out. It's true that a double standard still exists here and there, so I would keep your number to yourself. Some people wonder if they can trust a person who has had lots of partners. I had to wrestle with this before I took the plunge from friends to bf/gf with my guy.
     
  18. octavius

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    That is a lot for your age, but it is not necessarily a bad thing. Looking back I walked away from a lot of relationship and sex opportunities I now wished I had taken. I’m probably better off but I occasionally ask myself “what if…” In some ways I’m envious. If all you are having is one night stands though, I think that is a problem. Not because one night stands are bad, but because there is value to long stable healthy relationships…including (in my opinion) much better sex experiences. There is something exciting about a new person, but there is emptiness to it also if that is all you are doing.

    Now as a guy I am not threatened by a girls past relationships…no matter how many there are. Should I be more threatened by a girl who has slept with 50 guys or a girl who spent 10 years with the same guy and slept with him thousands of times? Every relationship has its own positives and negatives. Just because you’ve had good experiences with other people doesn’t mean that negatively reflects on me. In fact women who are in touch with their sexuality are a great asset in a relationship. Ultimately that is the major factor in how much she enjoys sex…I’m just a facilitator. If you are experienced, that just makes my job easier and more fun.
     
  19. subvim66

    subvim66 New Member

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    Agree as well:phat
     
  20. 12barblues

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    Seems like a lot of sound advice here..... I'm a guy, late 40's, been with about 22 to 25 women in my life. All but two of them came in a three month span when I was single in my twenties.....so I guess , like backcheck, I've been loyal/ monogamous ....and I've been " busy" ..lol.....but i dont think either one defines me as a person or anything. It's just where I was , at different times in my life.
    Its just sex, Do what you want to do, be comfortable in your own skin, and don't let others judgement effect you. And yes...be safe.