Jeff, did you mention if you had kids or not? I don't recall.

I was thinking that if your wife was anything like me, when she threw herself into motherhood, she stopped thinking of herself as a sexual being and focused on being a caregiver to the baby. I think that is why a lot of women gain weight after they have kids. It's not because they care so very little for themselves, it's that they are in "mommy" mode and everything else falls by the wayside.

For the first 8 years of being a mom, I admit to hardly ever wanting sex and dressing sexy was the last thing on my mind. My husband didn't pursue sex and kind of just stepped aside and let me try to be Super Mom.

What you need to do, Jeff is, remind her she's a woman, a sexual being, not just caregiver. She probably lost touch with her inner sexiness, so you need to help draw it out of her.

Good luck.

Barbwire a.k.a. Cowboy Lover