I have approached her with my concerns and she says she understands some of my issues, but then she tells me that she is sorry she can't be that porn star that I want her to be and that throws me for a loop. I understand that I may have overwhelmed her with all the issues at once, but I don't think that they are unreasonable. Then I try to understand were the porn star remark come from and can't actually pin that one down neither. I often think that I should just put it aside for now and maybe things will get better but then they seem to get worse. I know in my heart and in my head that she is the most complicated and sometimes conflicted woman I have ever known but there is something so beautiful, sexy and unremarkable about her that makes me want to love her for the rest of my life, even if I have to do all the loving.

We do have 3 kids (I have 1 son, she has 1 son and a daughter - boys r 12 & 11 and the girl is 8). Of course we have normal problems that you have with kids, but nothing terrible. Also she is turning 30 in a month and she has been talking about it for months and how she doesn't want to be 30. I think she is gonna be one of those that thinks her life is over since she is 30. Could this be an issue?