Dildos that vibe don't to a heck of a lot for me while they are inside because I need the vibes to be on my clit for maximum pleasure. Just yesterday I tried to use the new vibe/dildo my husband got me without it ever touching my clit. I left it inside, working it this way and that trying like hell to get a g-spot orgasm from it.
After about an hour of frustration, I just threw it to the side and used my old standby rubber dick while using my Eroscillator on my clit and I came like a wild beast.
The Hitachi Magic Wand that I use a lot has an attachment for vaginal penetration and that feels great but only because even when it's inside of me the little nub at the base of it still hits my clit.
I have never gotten off by just using a dildo or a dick inside of me. If your wife is the type that can come from penetration alone, then a dildo might do it for her, though.
To get more pointers you might want to look at some amatuer porn of women masturbating with dildos to see how it's done.
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