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Originally Posted by mleoutdoors  I cannot usually climax thru intercourse alone, I have to have manual stimulation every time. Does anyone else have this issue too? I always climax thru manual. |
This is so very common for many women. Having studied this for years, here is what I have counseled numerous women with very good success.
A man's penis has nerve receptors along the shaft, with a concentration in the foreskin, and just behind the glans. His receptors provide stimulation from a
friction type of motion, so when his penis enters your vagina, he is thrusting his penis in and out to give his penis that frictional stimulation from the walls of your vagina. He responds the same way to oral and hand stimulation of his penis.
At this point in sex, the woman has been brought to a stage of arousal where her vagina is lubricated with her own fluid to make the penis friction comfortable to both of them. Now she just holds her position, letting his do all the work of thrusting and just waiting for something inside of her to erupt -- but it is not likely ever going to happen.
The problem is that her vagina is
not equipped with the frictional type of nerve endings to respond to the friction of his penis trusting in and out along her vaginal walls.
However, her vagina
is lined with nerve receptors, but unlike the penis, her nerves are responsive to
pressure, not friction! The vagina is surrounded by a major muscle, know as the P.C. (short for
pubococcygeus) muscle. It controls urine flow and contracts during orgasm. The best way to discover this important muscle is to begin your pee flow, then stop it and hold is stopped for a few seconds. The muscle you just used to stop your pee flow was your P.C. muscle.
Getting back to sex - when his penis is inserted into your vagina, you need to start squeezing his penis with your P.C. muscle, over and over again. Your squeezing will activate the
pressure nerves in your vagina. This should feel good, but will take some "work" or effort on your part. Try to squeeze his penis just as hard as you can, you can't hurt him, but you should begin to feel your own arousal rising in intensity. You may find yourself moving your hips to "grab" his penis and pull it inside of you. This is your half of the sexual effort to have your orgasm. He can provide the penis to give your vagina the pressure, but you must provide the squeeze, the pressure to stimulate yourself to your own orgasm.
You may have heard some women say them prefer a
large penis, but what they are referring to is a
thick penis, not a long one, because it is the thickness, and the
stiffness that provides the pressure required for their orgasms. Women can not be passive during sex and expect to have the full experience.
In contrast, your clitoris is equipped with the
friction type of nerves like his penis is, so that is why friction and touching on your clit will provide a path to your orgasm.
If this is new information to you, you may be wondering how you have never heard of this before. Several reasons -
- if you watch someone having sex (porno flix), you can't see this happening;
- any woman doing this assumes that every other woman is doing this too and it just doesn't work for her, so she doesn't think she has anything to say to you;
- many woman just don't know this, so we can't expect them to pass it along.
- women often learn about sex from men -- who don't have a clue how a woman's body responds sexually. They just expect her to do it like they do.
Please try this and come back here and let us know what your experience is with using your vaginal muscles to stimulate your orgasmic reflexes with his penis. Yes, I know, you age getting this from a MAN, but one who cherishes women and is learning as much as I can about them to make them happy. Don't be afraid to teach me gals!
I really hope this changes your sex life for the better, forever.
-J-
thank you, I will discuss this with my partner tonight to get her view
