Anal

Hi this is my first post.
Me and my girlfreind have been trying anal for sometime now and everytime we try it wont go in and it really herts both of us. A real uncomfortable feeling can any suggest anything? Thanks guys

Welcome to . You will find, if you do a search, that anal has been discussed plenty here. I am sure you will get all the answers to your questions if you look.

Totally relax and make sure you are really in the mood. Don't push yourselves it will only make it worse. I dont particulary like it but do it from time to time so that is my advice!!

Honey, why are you doing something you don't enjoy? A guy who cares about and respects you isn't going to want you to engage in any sexual activity that's uncomfortable and/or painful.

I like it from time to time just not all that much I have to be really in the mood for it. I didn't say I hated it.

If it hurts (even a teeny bit), stop immediately. You can do serious damage back there if you aren't careful. It should never, never, never, ever hurt. A lot of people need to begin anal play with small toys and work their way up to larger objects (i.e. penis). And it can take a while for the body to adapt; rarely, it can take a few years. Get a good anal lube like WET or Boy Butter (do NOT get something like Anal-eze because you need to know if there is any pain!), and make sure she really wants to get involved in anal play or else she won't be relaxed or aroused enough for it.

Here's a little good reading on anal sex: http://www.talksexwithsue.com/analsex.html.

Be safe and have fun!

Gotcha. When you said "I don't particularly like it", I took that to mean you'd be a happy camper if you knew you'd never have to do it again. It seems I misunderstood. Sorry!

*snaps to attention* We got a free sample of anal-eze with some stuff we ordered from Adam & Eve. It had sat around for months, but a few weeks ago, I had my husband grab it for when we had our first DP (wand with attachment in vagina, penis in anus) Now, it was the first time I tried using the wand with him, and I was in a position that we had never tried before, and for the first time I actually liked anal. It was a bit painful for about a stroke or two as he broached the entrance, but after that it was very stimulating to me. I HAD thought I enjoyed it because of the new position and the stimulation the wand offered my clitoris and g-spot, but now I am wondering if it was the lube, itself.

I take it that there is a numbing agent in Anal-ese?

my gf and i have tried anal ease, but we still have yet to have anal sex. (Just get the head in and she wants to stop). I put it on my fingers and they tingle then go numb, she says she can feel her butt go a lil numb too. I don't really like it because i want her to feel everything, and theres no point of us having anal sex if shes not goin to enjoy the whole experience, but we use it as a measure of taking baby steps till eventually not needing it at all.

For anybody trying anal sex for the first time, take it slow. I highly recommend starting with your finger at first and using lots of lube. Remember to always clean up afterwards. Being sanitary is often overlooked. When your girl is comfortable with one finger, try 2. Though it may take a couple weeks, eventually she'll be ready for the real thing. When she is, use a condom and make sure to keep the lines of communication open. You won't want to jackhammer, and she'll know when it's too rough. Of the few times I've done anal I've only been able to insert a few inches and wiggle around. I think girth is more of a limiting factor than length. If you're thick keep it in mind and be sensitive to her needs. Ultimately, anal sex is all about her, in my opinion. Pay attention to her body language and know her limits as well as yours.

Anal isnt for everyone, but it might be for you, keep that in mind.

First, dont start by sticking a penis in the ass, thats way to big for the first time. Anal is different than vaginal sex, because its not really designed to accept big things easily. (im not saying its bad, i love it both ways personaly)

Be relaxed, this is the most important thing you can do. It will keep the anus from convulsing and causing sharp pain for both. Take a warm bath, play some sooting music, use some aeromatic things like body wash or insence.

Start small. Please for your own good use 1 finger when you first try it. Slowly press utill it goes in, then pull it out and repeat. Do this slowly. Over time get deeper and deeper. After 1 finger can go all the way in comfterbly, together agree that another should be added. Continue the process untill required width.

LUBE LUBE LUBE. The anus does not a bartholin's gland, which means it does not produce its own lube, so you must get some to use. Make sure you use plenty.

Communication durring anal is very important. Make sure there is a safty word, even if its just stop. Anal can sometimes be painful if done wrong and if it is, stop imediatly.

Clean it out. Make sure before anal that the anus is clean. Have a full bowel movement 2 hours before, or an enema. A dirty anus is one that will hurt and make a mess, a clean one feels great for both.

Take it slow, dont go shoving large things into an ass too quickly. Also, do not transfer anything from the ass to the vagina, its bad and can cause infections.

number one rule for anal sex.....lube, lube, and more lube!

fore play is most important...get her warmed up and ready. next step is LUBE up your fingers, if you think you have way to much lube on, put on some more! lube her anus. insert ONE finger and work it in SLOWLY....be slow and easy. you will feel the muscles in her anus relax after you have SLOW fingered her for a while. after she relaxes, insert the second finger SLOWLY!! she will react to your fingering, and you'll know when she's ready for your cock. lube, lube and put more lube on your cock and GENTLY press it into her anus. don't push hard, just steady....you will feel her relax even more and accept the head of your dick. once the head is in, push GENTLY until you are in to your balls..move SLOWLY in and out until SHE starts to pick up the pace. gradually speed up the pace. she will meet your thrusts when she's become comfortable and is enjoying it....that's when you can tell what the "speed limit" is.

my wife loves for me to slam her hard once we get going. it will ALWAYS be the same slow start whenever you have anal sex.

the best lubes are:

ID lube
astroglide
Sliquid
and Slippery Stuff

always use a silicone based lube......read the label!!

NEVER use a petrolium based lube...it burns her anus and causes more difficulties. never use vaseline or anything of that nature.

Don't force yourself to do it..if you don't like it..simply don't do it.

apparently anal should NEVER hurt, just take it slow.. lube up and relax (If she doesn't want to do it, STOP) Do not put her under pressure, i can't stress this enough!

You have to take it slow. Don't just shove it in or it will hurt. Like relaxhun said, use some lube and take it easy. If it still won't happen, leave it!

'WHEN THERE IS NO MORE ROOM IN HELL, THE DEAD WILL WALK THE EARTH'.